Thursday, August 19, 2010

celebrating the superficiality of all things being made equal

let us join hands
you and i
and tramp down this falling away
road new paved with over-baked schemes
and the shattered
windshield glass from a dream car
we left for dead many miles back
every tire including the spare had blown
and they still hiss their casual tunes
while popped-out
flesh-tone hoses
dangle and sprinkle
a rainbow gloss on black-rimmed puddles
it’s a cause for deepening joy
these shallows won’t
dry up in either of our weened lifetimes
moisten your lips dear
and make that pineapple-sweet whistle
i love to taste
when i dare to plant my tongue there
the food’s long gone
and pots are now for banging
we’ve lost our way
and maps are made for shredding
into playfully themed streamers
we’ll tie in our hair
as we dance off the waning
silky heat of a too-late summer
the sun’s dial is flipping
and bound by those zeros
we’ve gotta go but it’s best
we’re brought low together

This week's Big Tent Poetry prompt is a wordle, that jumbled confection of vocabulary you can see pictured at right. It's a bit of a secret mash-up; the words were taken from an unrevealed but "well-regarded" poet's published poems, so check back in to the BTP site to find out who that was. I'm sure they'd be surprised to see their words put to this particular use :^).


human being said...

the rhythm and the images join hands to create a beautiful sense of freedom here... when you feel you are walking on a new path... no! it can be the same path... but suddenly you are looking at it with 'new' eyes...

really liked it!

(the way you have worked your way through those words in the prompt is... more than creative!)

brenda w said...

Wow! I love this, Francis. Strong cadence pulled me through it. The title grabbed me right away, and what a satisfying read.

Anonymous said...

Wonderful word art, Francis. You have created a delightful masterpiece from the word prompts provided. I second that "Wow" from human being.

Paul Oakley said...

It's as if TS Eliot and BH Fairchild had a lovechild! Incredible!

...over-baked schemes
and the shattered
windshield glass from a dream car
we left for dead many miles back

You've outdone yourself, Francis.

vivienne blake said...

The pace of the poem caught me up and swirled me through to the end. A satisfying read.

Mary said...

This poem captured me at the beginning and took me along in its flow to the end. So many vivid images. I enjoyed these lines particularly:

we’ll tie in our hair
as we dance off the waning
silky heat of a too-late summer

Unknown said...

It sounds a fun journey, Francis! I like those 'casual tunes' that the tyres still hiss, the sweet pineapple whistle and the poignancy of the last two lines.

Elizabeth said...

Started laughing when I saw the title and thoroughly enjoyed the romp through your field of words. Especially liked the pineapple whistle and the final lines. But that's not fair, I really liked the entire piece from beginning to end.


Diane T said...

It's amazing the stories we come up with. Love particuarly the pineapple sweet whistle! Excellent!

flaubert said...

Francis I love the flow of this piece. The images are engaging!

Stan Ski said...

Packed with great images and reads fluently.

barbara said...

Great dance!
Poor car. wonder what made it fall to pieces like that.
I buried a TBird for the wordle.

Wayne Pitchko said...

nicely sdone francis....flowed really well

Deb said...

Fabulous sentiment in all the decay -- I mean it's downright "cheery" and yet there is clearly impending death & doom.

Love that!

(And yes, I wonder what the featured poet might think of our exercise!)

gautami tripathy said...

Love that title.

It was a pleasure reading it.

dances of the zeroes

Tumblewords: said...

A powerful piece. It's a delightful read and then the reality sneaks in and...then... This makes me smile before becoming teary-eyed.

Cynthia Short said...

The cadence of this piece draws the reader in, and then the story within holds you tightly throughout. Very nice!