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Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Fruit of a Bizarre Love Triangle (POW Prompt 3)

If I hedge thus a drooling wager and cash
in on my thrice-foiled cravings for her over-due bites
(plus a guilt-free laugh at his expense), I can
use minced steps to sidle around too-lively
trunks, and avoid the need to heed thugs
barking mad from within their crevice-laid traps.

How those bug-eyed brutes'll clamor and claw at me
to discard this protective wrap, clued in by my rep
of never bending willfully to anybody
but her. "Come on, shed! Get, uh, new set of scales,
for you we will -- promise!" is how she'd stammer,
roughly translating their not-so-twee chatter,

if she were there. Rather, in that lavishly apt way
she has, she'll be off picking suitable pelts
to adorn her newly uncovered, quite-public shames
while fending away an advancing clod, who won't go
easily, but who does go on ad nauseam with
a penchant for naming every God-damn thing

that haps vitally across his cocky path. Beyond
a simple relish of mischief, I'm doing this (mostly)
for her benefit. How could a persimmon
be forbidden, as if he had permission to make
such bargains? He's dismissed it as an ungainly fruit,
and mocked its likelihood to "lava thy lips"

with an orange pulp, but in that chance smattering lies
the matter to inflame my soul. I'll feed her
the pudding-fresh flesh, stripping it down
to its delectably small seeds, and in their splitting
I'll glean the silvery utensils to spill
a man's wholly worthless future. Let's tuck in.



This piece is written (a little ahead of time) for the Poetry on Wednesday Prompt 3, and it will require some explanation. A passage from a Ted Hughes poem, in which he describes tasting a fresh peach at 25 (click the link to read it), was the initial inspiration, but my mind wandered into the realm of forbidden fruits and somehow interjected a persimmon into an alternate history of the Garden of Eden told from the serpent's point of view. Note that colored phrases in the text indicate anagrams I used for Ted Hughes and Sylvia Plath.

13 comments:

angie said...

wow -- lots to chew on in this one!
I love the anagrams, especially "hedge thus." makes me think of hedge apples, and then the mind just rolls along all the way to the persimmons.

Andy Sewina said...

Very nicely thought through and presented. I was having fun working out the anagrams!

Funnily enough I wrote a simple poem once that I subtitled 'The anagram of Eden' Poet Tree

Rallentanda said...

If you are planning on visiting St Peters in Rome again you might have to do some mincing steps to avoid the inquisition.You would like 'Theology' by Ted Hughes. I will put it on my blog for you in the comment section.
PS Those anagrams are cool!

Unknown said...

If only my mind worked like this, Francis! Wonderful words, anagrams and a persimmon, thrown in for luck. I loved it!

Anonymous said...

We always see Sarpant as male, don't we? Ever wonder what the hissing missus was up to while he was planning sedition?

vivienne blake said...

Clever idea, the puns. I once wrote a sestina in which all of the key words were anagrams of poetry

Ted Hughes is not my favourite poet and his wives not the most fortunate of women, but your poem interested me greatly.

human being said...

how i always loved to read such a poem one day... the serpent's side of the story...

and now i'm reading it... rejoicing in the way you have woven the story of forbidden fruit and all that into this work...

tone... that invisible thread pulling all these pearls of images together is what impresses me the most...

and...

ah... when the joy is immense, you cannot say much!



and now i understand you saying you think you have climbed that ladder (moebius ladder)...

:)


namaste!



wv: revelyso
:)

Francis Scudellari said...

@Angie I may have overstuffed it. I'd never heard of hedge apples. They look quite gnarly.

@Andy Cool... I'll check it out. Would that be "need"?

@Rall I wasn't familiar with that Hughes poem, so thanks for posting it. I like his image of the serpent in a food coma.

@Derrick Thanks, but I don't think I'd wish this mind's workings upon you :).

@Briarcat If I brought the hissing missus unto this, it would become a love quadrangle. Good point about the serpent's gender, I probably shouldn't have assumed, and they're hard to sex.

@Vivienne Think of Hughes as the inspiration for my Adam, with Plath as Eve, and you'll understand the serpent's opinions.

@hb Every story has more than one side :). When I get high enough on those ladders I lose track of which direction I'm heading.

J. D. Mackenzie said...

Quite an artistic collision here, blending the mechanics of the anagrams with some piquante word sounds. Got our attention enough for many repeat readings, all rewarding.

Francis Scudellari said...

Hi JD ... Thanks! Anagrams have become a recurring device for me. I'm glad it bore up to multiple readings.

one more believer said...

a most enjoyable journey. the anagrams a wonderful treat...

flaubert said...

This fantastic Francis!
Love the anagram!
Pamela

flaubert said...

This is fantastic Francis!
Love the anagram!
Pamela