Wipe away that image of
beating butterfly wings
and the currents they send across
great continents.
See instead, you and me
arranged on the same vast
plate — two irregular green peas
rolling around the nucleus of a split pod.
Even if we don’t meet here and now —
snagged by an intervening fork,
set off course by rivulets of gravy,
separated by marbled slabs of meat,
or consumed by a gravity-defying, black-
holed gob — somewhere
on parallel, fine-clothed
tables, we’ll savor the joy of
big-banged, trajectory-altering collisions.
At Big Tent Poetry this week, Nathan Landau suggested we dabble in steganography. Mine isn't a very challenging code to break. Each stanza represents a word. Each line contains one letter in the word, and the line's number indicates where to look for the letter (counting from the left, and ignoring spaces and punctuation). I wouldn't have made a very good cryptologist.
15 comments:
Simple as it is, I'm no code breaker...
You make a valid point.
We are all steaks in a sea of peas?
I think that we are star-crossed lovers, trying to find each other in the gravy of everyday life.
Well, I got "we dangw" and then realized I was not doing something right. Oh well - I love the poem just fine uncoded!
What is the code? does is have to do with the " gravitational force of attraction between lovers"?
This was so great! It reminded me of a tv show I have been watching (which gives me a brain cramp) called, "Into the Wormhole" with Morgan Freeman.
Love how you used something so pedestrian, (peas) to symbolize a difficult and amazing concept!
Francis-- From great notions to present moments... you are right, though...and I do think the impact of beating butterfly wings supports your hidden message. Well done!
~Brenda
ahha. I was counting all the lines, not just counting within stanzas.
You chose an interesting image to plop yourself down into--greasy gravy is our universe
Francis so what you are saying that we are all star-crossed lovers looking for each other through the gravy.
Very clever idea!
Pamela
holy cow!
you can be classified as a metaphysical poet by this one!
bet even John Donne whould have clapped for you... (though he didn't know anything about black holes or big bang...)
:D
choosing those far-fetched images... and knitting them together into a net... to hunt the 'fading attention' of the audience... or a heart... to convice it to be more realistic... eh?
this is fabulous!
all through reading it, i was saying wow wow wow!
that 'gravity-defying, black-holed gob' just killed me!
it was so climactic...
:)
think butterflies know better than any other being how the trajectory of collisions changes...
:)
Really like the poem, its images of being peas on a plate, staring up at the big black maw. And it, for some reason, I can't explain, made me think of a pool table, colored balls instead of peas, and how even a good eye can only hope the trajectory is correct.
Elizabeth
I'm glad you gave us the key, Francis! Your butterfly mind alighted on pulsating peas. Can I have extra gravy?!
Oh, I love the way you hid your message! Very clever.
By golly, you are muy clever - this is creatively complex and simple at the same time - I love it. Of course, I used the decoder, of course. :)
For all those who hadn't guessed, the message is "We are all entangled"
@Stan You know what they say about a broken clock...
@Rall I'm not a big fan of steak, so let's make it roasted chicken instead :)
@Vivienne Yes, but only star-crossed in some realities... in parallel worlds we always collide.
@twitches I should have pointed out that the line numbers should be counted within the stanzas, so at each new one start back at 1.
@Mory It's my bad take on quantum physics.
@Cynthia Physics has never been my strong suit, so I'm glad it made some sense :).
@Brenda Yes, the discounting of butterfly wings was a red herring.
@Barbara The universe as gravy theory might explain the sudden plague of obesity :).
@Pamela Not so much lovers as travelers looking for connections/collisions.
@hb The mere thought of John Dunne reading this brings a smile to my face. Hearts are stubborn things and don't like realism :)
@Elizabeth The pool table image works too, although I'd shrink the balls and make that felt stretch infinitely outward.
@Derrick If you eat all the peas, you can have extra gravy.
@Watersword Getting the letters to line up wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be, though the last few lines were a challenge.
@Susan The concept of entanglement is much more complex than my take on it :)
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