Concise lines, Francis. The visual of "to dive in and flail" is a very vivid one. The word "flail" is interesting and funny (maybe I think that because English is not my native language). Sounds a bit like children's language.
I've been using Twitter to write daily very short poems, which helps me hone in on an image. I like the comical sense of the word "flail" too. I used it instead as an alternative to "fail" and like it much better in that context.
8 comments:
Concise lines, Francis. The visual of "to dive in and flail" is a very vivid one. The word "flail" is interesting and funny (maybe I think that because English is not my native language). Sounds a bit like children's language.
I've been using Twitter to write daily very short poems, which helps me hone in on an image. I like the comical sense of the word "flail" too. I used it instead as an alternative to "fail" and like it much better in that context.
.
never fear to f(l)ail
each beat separates a g(r)ain
.
and that g(r)ain will be harvested
by those who f(ol)low unimpeded.
you are in the stream
flowing
by
or
through
or
over
all obstacles
with a joyful scream
I have to stay within the stream's banks, or my scream may become less joyful :).
banks are no borders
you can disobey them like orders
flood
and in the veins of the thirsty land
be a the feeding blood
evaporate
and fly with the wind
then come back to your homeland
as the refreshing rain
That may indeed be a more productive journey.
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